we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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