You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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