Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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