SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
high people should be assigned attendants
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Drunk is not a location!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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