i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
