remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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