yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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