Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
