Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
