oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Are we still banned from the library?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize