PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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