Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
