I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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