You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize