He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
