He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
So here I am, sexting at work.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
