Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
