i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
