He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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