the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Randomize