Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
