The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Who wears a wallet chain?!
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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