It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
