So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Naked. naked and bneed help.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
