it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
