aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
