you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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