He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
