so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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