idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize