I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize