He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Randomize
