you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize