if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
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