We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I supernannyed him into submission
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
