I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Never underestimate the power of titties
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