I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
