Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
