if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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