I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
