she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
