i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize
