You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Randomize
