My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
did you just send me my own nude
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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