Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
