On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
