i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
Randomize