we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
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