He told me they were just razor bumps!
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
Randomize