Sober January is a disaster.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
